2013 Android Phones: Televisions Don’t Belong on Your Face

Written by Colton Chesnut on . Posted in Tech

You know exactly what I am talking about.

You’ve seen the Samsung Galaxy Note 2 when walking through the mobile department at your local Best Buy. The Note 2 is not a mobile phone. It is a television. I have had one up to my face and I don’t like it. Not because I would have to buy new pants with larger pockets to own one, but because it simply lacks original thought. I don’t want to sound like I’m on a total rant, there is a point to this.

In the mid to late 90′s, a similar thing happening. Except this time it was with Microsoft instead of Google. I know right now it seems like Apple is on top with sales, the cool factor, and yes – being the original touch screen phone maker. However just like in the 90′s, I submit that they have already been lapped. New Google phones are being introduced about as frequently as Processors were nearly 2 decades ago. The fuel was dozens of different hardware companies that had the infrastructure to build the products, but didn’t have the software to run them. Instead of having IBM, now we have Samsung. Same old story. Apple was the first company to make it to market with an affordable personal computer. They had a closed platform then (making the hardware and the software themselves) and they have a closed platform now (vetting all apps and tweaks through proprietary store).

It seems to me that the next event on our timeline is either; A) Apple comes out with yet another break through product we can’t remember a time without, or B) Apple loses all market share to the open platform and nearly goes bankrupt. Which do I think will happen? Well that brings us back to the title of this article, and my current problem with Android hardware makers – where is the innovation? It seems like all you have done so far is taken the iPhone and stretched it out. I’m sorry, I just don’t want to hold a television up to my face to take a phone call.

phone-size-comparison-tool-1327566514Google has been doing some truly amazing things with Android these days, it seems that we need some hardware that can keep pace with their software. To illustrate this phone size growth, take a look at the Nexus branded Android phones in this picture. Keep in mind these phones were introduced from January 2010 to November 2011 – less than two years…

Another request that would earn my respect for Android – get rid of your obscene amounts of bloat-ware handset makers. We didn’t like it in Windows and we don’t like it on our phones. There is a reason we find the Mac an attractive computer that we want to spend our time working on – it is clean, powerful, and simple to use. Pre-installing all of your “free”, non-functioning, and simply just lame carrier branded apps have no place on our phones. They slow down and clutter Android in a way that makes Google look bad. My wish to anyone who wants an Android phone – buy whatever the current Nexus phone is. Directly from Google at google.com/nexus. You will get the latest software updates, clean and pure Android minus the bloat-ware. (whoa, that paragraph had a lot of hyphens).

With these complaints about Android on the table, and in the spirit of true cynicsm – lets talk Apple for a second.




That is the number of devices that are currently jailbroken (as of writing this article). I mentioned my thoughts about this on twitter recently, it just seems that if that many people are trying to get more flexibility from their devices – then it seems as a user base we either expect too much from you Apple, or you aren’t listening to us very well. If I were a member of the iOS dev team working in Cupertino, I think one of my first changes would be to hire Jay Freeman aka saurik. Jay is the man behind Cydia, the popular app store for jailbroken apps. It seems that if anyone has a good idea what people want their phones to do – its him.

Closing thoughts, both platforms are extremely good. I have a certain place in my heart for both actually. One of my best friends works for Apple, they are doing some of the best work the tech world has seen. Google, they created one of my favorite phones of all time, the Nexus One. I’ll leave it up to you which is best, for now these are my thoughts are why I won’t be buying an Android television for my face any time soon.


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Colton is a software engineer for a company in Lindon UT. He loves spending time with his girls, photography, being outdoors, and working on his classic mustang. You can find him on steam @marlais and twitter @coltonjchesnut.