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Watch Premiere League Soccer

Written by Jarren Bird on . Posted in Sports

You like soccer right? Well what if, by some crazy means, soccer were actually called football? I know it seems odd to call a game where you ONLY use your feet “football” when there is a perfectly good game where you hardly ever use your feet called “football,” but such is the case in England. Our homeland. The place we come from. We call New York New York because in the UK there is an older place called York. We have New Hampshire because our former country has an older place called Hampshire. Those nutsos are crazy over there and they’re super crazy about football (soccer).

In England there is a league of football called the English Premier League, or EPL. There are 20 teams, most of which are in London (not really, but six teams are located in London which is a fair amount).

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How to Win at Fantasy Football

Written by Jarren Bird on . Posted in Sports

Welcome sports fans to the wonderful world of Fantasy Football! Now don’t be scared. There is absolutely nothing to be afraid of. If you are worried about being able to pwn your fellow fantasy cohorts whilst being a “n00b” then look no further. Just for you, I have compiled a step-by-step process on “How to Win at Fantasy Football,” and you can trust me because I’m like a doctor in a lot ways.

Step 1) Make sure you get the guy who will score the most points.

You only have one chance to get the guy who scores the most points. Here’s how you can do it…random luck. If you get the first pick in the draft (if the draft is a regular draft and not an auction draft) then you have a great opportunity to choose the player who will score the most points. If you are participating in an auction draft, then pay the most money to get the best player. If you are in a room with all the other guys in the league who will also be drafting, then you can research ways to blackmail all of them. You can then blackmail the guy who is given the first pick. What he will then do, because he is being blackmailed, is graciously and unsuspiciously turn the first pick over to you and you will then have a great opportunity to pick up the player who will score the most points.

But wait, you are in the middle of saying to me, “What if I have no way of knowing who will score the most points?”

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Exciting Games Shown at this Year’s E3

Written by Jarren Bird on . Posted in Tech

If you’re one of the many young people who grew up playing video games and have not decided to eschew them in pursuit of an “adult life” then you, my friend, are in luck. This week has brought us many promising new adventures in the video game world and I want to talk about a few of them. Note: These are only three of the many promising games shown at E3 and they are all multiplayer, first-person shooters. I personally prefer these types of games which is why I am focusing on them specifically.