This blog is about important things — or at least I hope it will be.

I am one of those deluded souls who still think politics and public policy matter. I’m not naive. I understand that Washington is broken. I understand that our political conversation has been bankrupted by extremism on the left and right, powered largely by hyper-partisan blowhards on agenda-driven cable “news” networks. I realize why people have so much reason to despair — things are bad, and there’s not always much reason to believe they’ll get better any time soon.

I get all that, but I guess I just disagree. Call me crazy, but I believe that ultimately, even in our darkest hour, cooler heads can and will prevail. We have the ability to come together and solve hard problems — that’s what America has always been about. And sure, the problems we face today are certainly some of the toughest we’ve seen, but they’re also no more difficult than facing down a genocidal maniac hellbent on conquering the world.

We’ve seen worse. We’ve overcome worse.

Maybe the difference this time is that the problems come from within. This time we’ve got to vanquish our own demons and overcome ourselves. Again, this isn’t the first time this has happened — the civil rights movement comes readily to mind — but that doesn’t mean it’s not discouraging.

Over the next few years, we’ll have to grapple with a rash of difficult policy decisions that will define the future of our nation, and a toxic political climate to boot. To be certain, there will be plenty who will spend that time screaming rather than providing productive ideas. I refuse to be one of them.

And I guess, at it’s core, that’s what this blog is about — adding another sane, reasonable voice to the conversation, regardless of partisanship or ideology.

I am, admittedly, to the slight left of center on the political spectrum. I believe in capitalism, but I also believe that markets can be flawed. I believe there is a proper place for government in contemporary American society, but I also believe that role should be performed in the most efficient and cost-effective manner possible.

But, most of all, I believe in America — who we are and who we can be. Sure, we may have our moments. We may yell at each other a lot. We may pay the Glenn Becks and Keith Olbermanns of the world entirely too handsomely for their unique brand of poison. But at the end of the day, regardless of all the hoopla that so often permeates our political climate, I believe the moderate majority of Americans (and, by extension, our elected representatives) will rise above the distractions and make the tough decisions necessary to move this country forward.

I have to believe that — because our history of doing so is far too long to be ignored and the alternative is far too grim.

Indeed, there are times when I think that Jack Kerouac’s Sal Paradise was right. Here in America, we do share some sad times — and this may well be one of them. But it hasn’t always been and it won’t always be that way. Together, we will figure it out. Things will get better, and this will continue to be the greatest and more prosperous country in the world.

That process starts with more than 300 million voices — including your voice and my voice. It starts with our decision to be reasonable and productive, to generate real ideas and share them in a respectful manner that can produce compromise and progress. It’s my prayer that this little blog can play some infinitesimally small part in that. I hope it can serve as a catalyst for stimulating thought and discussion amongst those who read it — and that you keep coming back for more.

After all, Sal Paradise may be right — but he doesn’t have to be.

On August 28th, Glenn Beck will unveil his plan to “save our country.” Mr. Beck has been getting his followers prepared for what he calls “The Plan” over the past few months, much the same way his rants led to The 9/12 Project and the Tea Party. Take, for example, the talking points used by both Beck and his Tea Party followers. Just the other day, both were on the verge of tears ranting about how they need to “take our country back.” How could they accomplish such a valiant effort? That is where The Plan comes in.

Beck has been dropping hints and providing previews of what The Plan will contain. The anticipation is building to the point where Beck’s organized followers are undoubtedly going to make a pretty significant showing in a couple months. I know I can’t wait.

On his website, Beck tries to entice his readers by giving hints as to what the plan will contain, laying out a plan for “action steps that each of us can take to play a role in America’s re-founding.” (Re-found is not in Webster’s Dictionary, by the way.) That, in itself, is not unorthodox for Glenn Beck. But here’s the kicker — he says that God is revealing to him this master plan to re-found America.

No joke.

Here is what he said in his own words: “God is giving the plan, I think, to me,” followed by claiming it is “a plan that He would have me articulate.” He then makes clear his discipleship with this gem: “I haven’t seen Jesus and what he would do on a talk show on Fox, but I’m gonna try.”

I cannot make this stuff up.

Here’s how it happened. Beck was having a conversation with his co-host Pat Gray and he mentioned to him that he felt a darkness. His own words really articulate it better than I can so here you go: “I said, ‘I can feel it coming. It’s darkness, and I can just feel it coming.” So Beck went home with his co-host and prayed. Later, after he and his sidekick had finished praying, they began reading the Bible. He said they “found something the next day that I think is important for you.”

That is how “The Plan” came to be, ladies and gentlemen.

If a political pundit trying to position himself as a leader of conservative thought starts making outrageous statements like that in an attempt to create a movement so powerful it must be referred to as “The Plan,” you should probably take a step away from the bandwagon. But, according to Beck, it is meant to be and should be taken seriously since it is not only coming from God himself, but also has the blessing of the Founding Fathers. It is what they want as well, of course. Beck said as much and so it is; It will contain the “values of the Founding Fathers.”

As if all that wasn’t enough, the timing of it all is impeccable. It is not a coincidence that Beck chose August 28th as the date to reveal such a marvel. That is the anniversary of none other than Martin Luther King Jr.’s historic “I Have a Dream” speech. Insulting, perhaps? If it isn’t insulting, it sure is pretentious.

And, of course, “The Plan” will be available in book form soon too, so Glenn clearly has no ulterior motives besides his sincere desire to bless us all with his revelatory saving powers. Nor does his advocating the investment of gold as a good idea in these hard times have anything to do with his sponsorship by Goldline, which rips off consumers by overcharging for their gold products. No conflict of interest there either.

Listening to or watching his show for a week is enough for any sane person to realize this guy has lost it. How many red flags do Glenn Beck fans need?

For Mormons, that should be a distressing assertion. As a Mormon himself, Beck has always been something of an oddball. However, Potok’s point wasn’t that Beck is simply extreme, or embarrassing to people of one political persuasion or another. It wasn’t even that he personally disagrees with Beck and those like him. Rather, it was that Beck and others are actually helping hate become more common. Tellingly, Potok also points out that hate crimes in the United States are becoming more widespread, which could obviously correlate with the increase in hateful rhetoric.

Ironically, and because I too am a Mormon, I listened to this segment of On the Media between sessions of LDS General Conference. As some surely know, that’s a bi-annual event that teaches Mormons to strive for Christ-like attributes, like love and respect. Yet in the midst of that message I also ended up listening to an expert on hate speech point out that one of the most prominent Mormons in the United States is doing the exact opposite of what the Church teaches.

In the past, I’ve had friends argue that Beck and other commentators are wrong primarily in style. They’ve said that while people like Beck don’t accomplish much with their belligerent tone, the underlying message these figures endorse is still worth dignifying with attention.

Yet, Potok wasn’t arguing that Beck has an abrasive tone. He was saying that Beck’s content itself is the problem because it promotes hate. Juxtaposed against the backdrop of general conference, that seemed like it would disturb all Mormons, regardless of an individual’s political orientation.

Others might argue that NPR and Potok merely epitomize the “liberal media,” whose goal is to tear down “patriots” like Beck. Judging from Beck’s Arguing With Idiots — which I recently received as a gift — that’s the argument I’d expect Beck himself to make. Yet, whatever biases the radio network may have, it routinely invites conservative commentators on its shows and strives for neutrality. Recently, for example, I even listened to another conservative Mormon, Mitt Romney, on Talk of the Nation. The point, then, is that irrespective of any supposed biases, Potok and On the Media are serious sources presenting, in this case, findings based on empirical research. In other words, these accusations deserve to be taken very seriously.

Of course, Beck was little more than a footnote in Potok’s discussion, but the larger trend of increasing amounts of hate obviously conflicts with the values the LDS Church teaches. During general conference, at least one talk pointed out the need to maintain respect in public and private discourse, and more generally the Church routinely emphasizes temperance and civility. Unfortunately, however, those are attributes about which Beck and the Church now appear to disagree.

Listen to the original segment from On the Media here.

1) POLITICS: An intriguing (if more than a bit wishful) article speculating on favorite Mormon homeboy Mitt Romney’s uncanny fitness to oversee the implementation of President Obama’s new health care reform laws — you know, if he ever realized that he’s not all that talented at playing a politician. That being said, Romney would be uniquely qualified to oversee “Obamacare,” seeing as he passed a nearly identical law in Massachussetts during his time as governor. (Gasp!) An interesting thought to say the least. (Newsweek)

2) POLITICS: Chalk up another one for favorite Mormon homeboy #2 Glenn Beck and his merry band of loons. Just take a listen to this gem. It would be a great SNL parody if the guy wasn’t absolutely dead serious. (Think Progress)

3) TV: Tina Fey’s impression of Tracy Morgan is pretty much hilarious. “You look like you should be married to one of the San Diego Padres!” (YouTube)

4) TV: This is always a good question to ask oneself, especially if you have any interest whatsoever in that national singing competition on Fox that everyone seems to watch. (NY Mag)

5) MUSIC: As all good humans should know, Brooklyn bar-band extraordinaires The Hold Steady have a new album coming out on May 4th. The group’s fifth studio effort, entitled Heaven Is Whenever, will be their first since 2004′s Almost Killed Me not to feature (now former) keyboardist Franz Nicolay. Frontman Craig Finn has been quoted as saying the new record is more introspective and “less anthemic” as a result — but you would never know it from the album’s first single, “Hurricane J.” Go ahead and sing along. You know you want to. (Pitchfork)

Randal Serr

There’s a little too much love for Glenn Beck in Utah. I mean, I get it: He has an endearing story. He has overcome an addiction to alcohol and gone from a small radio program in Kentucky to CNN Headline News to the news source you can always count on, Fox News. He’s also very politically conservative, which may or may not have had something to do with him landing at Fox.

And let’s not forget he’s Mormon, which makes him especially popular here, the same way people supported David Archuleta on American Idol and all the other Mormon candidates on all the other reality shows. Not because they were necessarily the best participants, but because they were part of the Mormon culture which is undeniably very cliquish.

Add all those things together and this guy is getting more recognition and love in Utah (and particularly Utah County) all the time. Take, for example, the number of people “fanning” him on Facebook, the same way they “fan” the President of the LDS Church, families or the “Yes on Prop 8″ campaign. He has also emceed “Stadium of Fire,” Provo’s Fourth of July celebration, two years in a row, beating out Sean Hannity and others of his ilk. I’m not usually one to talk about the Mormon culture in the public arena because I feel like it is already so engulfing in this area, but I have to draw the line with this guy. I guess I’ve not been as impressed with him as others generally have been.

The first time I got turned off by Glenn Beck was back when he was still on Headline News. His guest that day was Keith Ellison, the first Muslim ever elected to the United States Congress. After warning Ellison that he was going to be politically incorrect and explaining that he knows and likes Muslims, Beck asked Congressman Ellison to prove his patriotism and demanded to know if he was “working with our enemies.” You can make all the arguments you want about it being a joke or about how political correctness is destroying America but, at the end of the day, it was tactless.

The antics don’t stop there. On June 30th, Beck agreed with a guest that insisted that it would take another attack from Osama Bin Laden for Americans to stop trying to earn praise from Europeans and demand that their government protect them with “as much violence as necessary.” That’s a little much isn’t it? Just a little excessive? Yet Beck’s popularity remains alive and well.

On July 28th, Beck called President Barack Obama, the country’s first black president, a racist on the “Fox & Friends” morning show. This comment has garnered quite a bit of attention lately, with at least 20 of Beck’s sponsors justifiably pulling advertisements from his show as a direct result of his statement. He went further though, saying that Obama has a “deep-seated hatred for white people” and “white culture.” (He tried to backtrack literally within two minutes: “I’m not saying he doesn’t like white people.”) Nevermind that Obama’s mother and half of his family is white. Nevermind the speeches he has given trying to improve race relations. Nevermind the fact that Beck has absolutely no factual backing for this outrageous claim. If the great Glenn Beck, Mormon superstar, says it, then it has to be true, right?

Beck employs a very common tactic that a lot of people use: They give a qualifier before saying something offensive. It’s like the person we have all run across at some point that says, “I’m not a racist but…” then goes on to use various pejoratives. Giving a qualifying statement does not mean you can say anything you want afterward.

Beck excels in this arena. On March 9th, he began using a recurring theme on his show about Obama lifting the ban on stem-cell research and its supposed link to eugenics, a tactic used by Hitler and the Nazis in an attempt to improve a population through breeding. He went on to blame “progressive doctors” and the “progressive movement and its science” for eugenics. Recently he did an entire segment on eugenics. After months of this nonsense, Beck tried to qualify his obsession with stem-cell research leading to eugenics on August 11th, explaining that “no one is saying eugenics is coming.” Actually, Glenn Beck has been saying (very loudly) that eugenics is coming for the past six months. If he doesn’t think eugenics is coming, then why is he even talking about it? But that’s how Beck does business: He qualifies, then makes outrageous claims.

Mormons can’t pretend like they don’t get offended when people make offensive or even politically incorrect comments about them or their faith. (That would be quite the double standard.) There have been many instances when Mormons have called each other to arms over comments made about the faith, myself included at times. For example, when ESPN analyst Ric Bucher played on Mormon stereotypes when discussing Utah Jazz fans, saying they are supposed to be “happy all the time,” thus causing them to “get vicious” at Jazz games because that is the only opportunity they have to do so. (He was later forced to apologize and replaced that weekend when he was scheduled to broadcast NBA playoff games, because of the Mormon backlash.) Or when Maureen Dowd of The New York Times made outrageous statements about Joseph Smith, causing Mormons to create a far-reaching chain letter to facilitate the sending of letters of protest to the newspaper. Or when Rev. Al Sharpton alienated himself and Christians in general from Mormons by referring to himself and other Christians as “those of us who believe in God,” implying that Mormons do not believe in such a deity. (He was forced to explain himself and apologize as well.)

The problem is that when Glenn Beck makes outlandish remarks, sometimes about other faiths and cultures, he is vehemently defended by the same group of Mormons that forcefully defend themselves when others say similarly insensitive things about them and their beliefs. The double standard abounds.

The love for good ol’ Glenn continues around here and that probably won’t change any time soon. Yet I am encouraged: There is a new group on Facebook called “Mormons Embarrassed by Glenn Beck.” Maybe a few fair-minded individuals will join that group and fight the lunacy.

Randal Serr is a liberal political columnist for Rhombus. No, you can’t excommunicate him for disliking Glenn Beck.

Steve Pierce

Rhombus recently took some heat for some rather vitriolic comments I made regarding Glenn Beck in my review of his appearance at this year’s Stadium of Fire event at BYU. I criticized his dress, his demeanor and his very being. I called him “douchey” and a “borderline psycho.” I said that I wanted to punch him in the face.

Upon reflection, I felt that I probably came off a little strong and a lot of the criticism was undeserved. After all, Glenn didn’t do that poorly and was actually quite affable as an emcee for the evening. And that moment near the end of the show where they retired a ginormous American flag by burning it… That one pulled at my heartstrings and made me proud to be a citizen of this great country. After speaking with multiple readers and hearing their more fair-minded assessments of Beck and the show, I decided that I had probably put a toe over the line in my criticism. I felt quite contrite, even penitent.

I don’t feel that way anymore.

Today’s issue of the Daily Universe has brought back all that fire — and then some. DU metro editor (and friend of Rhombus) McKay Coppins has a brilliant front page piece about — prepare yourselves — how the Freedom Foundation, the event’s sponsor, (and their knowing conspirator, Mr. Beck) faked the flag retirement! It was all a rouse, a fake, a fabrication! And how do they respond? They laugh it off!

Acting on tips from volunteers and employees at the event, The Daily Universe contacted Provo City Fire Marshall Lynn Schofield and asked if the flag had really been burned in the stadium, as the audience of 50,000 had been led to believe.

He said he had not allowed the flag to be burned because the noxious fumes produced by the fire could have been a hazard to those present.

When soldiers carefully placed the flag in a large cauldron-shaped container, attendees saw flames arise, creating the illusion that the flag was burning.

It was a somber moment for many, aided by an emotional speech by Glenn Beck, who acted as emcee for the event. He told those in attendance how lucky they were to witness a rare flag retirement.

“If our American flag could speak, oh the stories she would tell,” Beck said, fighting to hold back tears. “She is what we make of her and nothing more.”

In reality, the flag was sitting safely inside the container. Volunteers who were present at the rehearsals the night before said Beck was likely aware that the flag was not actually being retired.

I knew Glenn Beck didn’t have a genuine or sincere bone in his body. Just as on his television show, his appearance at the Stadium of Fire was merely an opportunity for him to generate a response. While he usually attempts to provoke outrage on the airwaves, he hoped to provide SOF attendees with a mirage of a patriotic experience. He even choked up as he talked about the flag, supposedly being destroyed before our eyes, that was actually lying safely in the bottom of the cauldron at mid-field. What a guy.

Sure, the fire marshall told the Freedom Foundation that they couldn’t burn the flag because of safety concerns. That’s understandable. But the fact that Beck chose to play along like there was something actually happening to the point that he was literally crying over our non-burning flag is shameful. It’s just all so disingenuous. They could still have created a memorable experience by allowing military personnel to perform the retirement ceremony without the (fake) flag-burning aspect — but they didn’t. Instead, they laughed in the face of the paying customers who felt duped. They turned a potentially wonderful, patriotic experience into a facade. They cheapened the experience for all involved.

I won’t lie: I don’t have a lot of respect for Glenn Beck because I don’t feel like he has much respect for anybody else. He showed his true colors again last Saturday night. I feel justified in my disrespect.

Steve Pierce is co-founder and editor of Rhombus. He feels better about calling Glenn Beck “douchey” in light of recent events.

Something I would never have envisioned myself saying: I paid money to spend my 4th of July with the Jonas Brothers and Glenn Beck.

Unfortunately, this travesty has now come to pass — and it wasn’t all that bad.

The annual Stadium of Fire celebration at BYU is the very definition of harmless, Mormon-approved and, by extension, bland popular music, mixed with a extra-heavy dose of flag-waving, jet-flying, externally displayed patriotism. The show always leans hard on big dramatic gestures and the same 10 “America” songs they’ve undoubtedly been using since at least the mid-1980s. (Big props to the SOF crew for resisting the temptation of Neil Diamond’s awfully cliched “America” during the fireworks montage. Nice show of restraint.) With these criteria in mind, I dare you to find me a more perfect match for the event than the offense-free pop of the Jonas Brothers and the waterworks and political melodrama of borderline psycho Glenn Beck. Throw in a Mormon country group, lots of American flags of varying sizes, a couple F-16 flyovers and a huge fireworks show that probably ripped its own hole in the ozone layer and you’ve got one rip-roaring 4th of July bash — or at least as ripping and/or roaring as such an event can get when hosted by a conservative pundit, played by prepubescent teenagers and attended by middle-aged Mormons and their preteen daughters.

Before we launch into the meat of the evening, just remember that I braved all this for you, dear readers. All to be your eyes and ears in that strange cultural event. And also because I was bored. But mostly for you.

ANYWAY, the evening began with the usual business of presenting the colors, singing the national anthem multiple times, watching young girls in surprisingly revealing (by BYU standards) uniforms dance around a football field in complex formations with colorful flags. You know, the usual. Nothing super spectacular. That was until the Music Man showed up.

Glenn Beck’s first appearance on-stage came in characteristically excruciating fashion: with full choir in tow, Beck ambled up to the mic sporting a red bowtie and a straw hat, then proceeded to do some poorly received Music Man-related shtick with the choir and really accomplished little except making me want to punch him in the face more than usual. Let’s be honest: I loathe the man more than is probably necessary for an individual to loathe a television personality — and that’s when he’s wearing regular clothes. His ridiculous outfit and accompanying smarm only served to aggravate my hate for the person he chooses to be. Fortunately for all involved, Beck’s words were scripted and relatively brief, a smart move on BYU’s part because you never know what asinine things will escape that man’s mouth when given a microphone. Even more fortunately, Beck was dressed as a regular person when he reappeared for his second monologue, not like Bozo the Clown. Small victories, people. Small victories.

To be honest, the whole ramp-up of the evening was fairly blase. Utah-based country group SHeDAISY played a six-song set and no one really cared. Sure, no one’s really cared about SHeDAISY for 10 years or so, but the sentiment was incredibly apparent in the apathetic silence of the crowd. They were all there for one reason and everyone knew it. They’d painted it on their homemade t-shirts, on their posterboard marriage proposals, on their acne-riddled faces and who knows where else. (There is undoubtedly some kind of Jonas Brothers graffiti, freshly fashioned with a glitter gel pen, in a Dairy Queen bathroom somewhere in Provo at this very moment.) Some might have thought this was Stadium of Fire, but let’s be honest: it was, first and foremost, a Jonas Brothers concert with fireworks.

I think I became 50% deaf when the teenage girl next to me got her first glimpse of Joe Jonas stepping onto the stage, her shrieks of delight completely melting my right eardrum. (To be fair, she did warn me of this possibility before the show.) Unfortunately for me, that was only the beginning of the screamfest that is a Jonas Brothers concert. As Nick and Kevin (though it appears the latter is significantly less popular for some reason) subsequently appeared and the boys launched into the up-tempo “Paranoid,” the noise level grew to the point where I lost my other eardrum and my face began to melt like the Nazi at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark. The 1o-year-old girl two rows behind me must be the world record holder for greatest lung capacity in the preteen girl division. I was betting that she would lose her voice after a few songs, but I was sorely mistaken. She screamed every single lyric for the full 55-minute set. It was both impressive and ear-splitting.

You might wonder why I am taking such pains to describe the nature of JoBros fans, and I promise you there is a point. The entire conflict over the brothers — Are they good? Do they suck? Is Joe’s voice too whiny? Is everyone too cynical to appreciate solid pop music? — should, in theory, be able to reach some kind of resolution in their live show. There is no greater measure of musicianship than live performance. Anyone can make something sound decent with enough takes in the studio, but the replication of that sound on-stage is the true test of a band’s mettle.

I wish I could say whether or not the JoBros passed that test, but I can’t. For me to say that the group delivered on Saturday night would require me to also be able to say that I actually heard a significant portion of the performance. In all reality, I maybe heard 40% JoBros, 60% screaming girls. Perhaps this is why there has been no definitive answer to the Jonas debate by fair-minded individuals: no one knows what they actually sound like live.

To analyze the situation as best as possible given the circumstances, the following seems to be true: a) the JoBros are very good at what they do, b) that doesn’t necessarily mean there’s much intrinsic value to what they do, c) Joe Jonas’ nasal croon is an aphrodisiac to young girls, d) no one knows what’s going through Kevin Jonas’ mind 98% of the time, and e) Nick Jonas’ prepubescent yelp sounds like a dying chihuahua. To be honest, there are worse things in the world than the Jonas Brothers. If my hypothetical daughters wanted to listen to the JoBros, I would prefer that to most of the other crap on Top 40 radio these days. No, they’re not Radiohead — and they’re not supposed to be. They’re teenage heartthrobs who actually (semi-)play their own instruments and write their own deceptively catchy and melodic pop songs. And that’s okay: America doesn’t need the Jonas Brothers to be anything more or less than the “It” boys of the moment.

The one thing that is most refreshing about the brothers is how unassuming they come off. You know they don’t believe they’re making “important” music; you know they realize all their records are bought exclusively by ravenous 10-year-old girls; you know they’re just a couple kids who wrote some catchy melodies, lucked into a sweet gig and fully intend to enjoy the ride. These things are okay. In a strange way, they actually represent the American dream. Sure, the Jonases aren’t timeless bulwarks of originality or ingenuity (they’re actually quite formulaic), but they represent a highly-stylized version of the familiar “regular guy(s) make good” narrative that this country lives for. If American popular culture needs a teen idol for every generation, I’m fine with the Jonas Brothers winning this round. At least they’re not Aaron Carter.

Steve Pierce is co-founder and editor of Rhombus. He cheered loudly for Kevin Jonas, mostly because he feels the oldest Jonas gets the raw end of the deal from those heartless 10-year-old girls.

WEEKEND UPDATE: Special 4th of July Edition

The Good:

America’s Freedom Festival: Balloon Fest | Saturday, 6:30 a.m., Provo High School (1125 N. University Ave., Provo)
There’s a lot of weird crap that people do on the Fourth that you don’t get to see very often otherwise. A massive launching of hot air balloons at 6:30 a.m. would be one of those things. I don’t think I’ve seen a hot air balloon since I was 10-years-old and, to be honest, I don’t even know where I’d begin to look. Fortunately, they happen to be bringing them into our backyard. So if you like big colorful, floating spheres and can stomach the early wake-up call, here’s a way to start your holiday off right.

America’s Freedom Festival: Grand Parade | Saturday, 9:00 a.m., University Avenue (Provo)
I’ve never been one for parades. I don’t really understand the people who must watch the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade every single year and if, for some unfortunate reason, they are busy at the time of its airing, they TiVo it. I don’t get that. (Maybe it’s the floats: they have no power over me.) Provo’s annual parade will have significantly less glitz than its big city counterpart, but it always receives rave reviews. People literally started camping out for spots along the parade route a few days ago. I don’t understand this, but I believe this must say something about the parade. Who knows — I could end up horribly disappointed. But at least I’ll know I satisfied my curiosity. I pray I do not lead you astray.

The Vibrant Sound | Saturday, 5:30 p.m., Tabernacle Stage (University Ave. and Center St., Provo), Free
I know, I know: we stumped for the Vibrant Sound last week as well. And while I promise that Rhombus is not becoming the band’s personal propaganda arm, I will say this: if you haven’t read our review for last weekend’s release party, do so. Then, come to the show. It’s for your own good really. If you missed out on Saturday’s awesome performance, you now have a second chance and — even better news — it’s free! The band’s blend of hip-hop, soul, R&B and funk defines what summer music should be. I can’t think of any better way to enjoy your early evening.

The In-Between:

Stadium of Fire: The Jonas Brothers | Saturday, 8 p.m., LaVell Edwards Stadium (Provo)
I’m very ambivalent about this event’s status. Positive: huge fireworks display. Intriguing: the cultural phenomenon of the Jonas Brothers. Less intriguing: the music of the Jonas Brothers. Equivalent to the black plague: Glenn Beck. Between these conflicting factors, it is difficult to make a cut-and-dried judgment of the intrinsic or extrinsic worth of this event. In the end, it probably comes down to price. Tons of tickets are still available for this year’s show (unlike when music goddess Miley Cyrus came last year), which means scalpers are going to be getting real antsy just before showtime. If you can get a cheap ticket, it might (might!) be worth checking out. If not, just sit outside and watch the fireworks. Hopefully you won’t be able to hear the bellowing of the great Beck — it would probably be wise to retain as many brain cells as possible.

The Bad:

Truman | Saturday, 2:00 p.m., Tabernacle Stage (University Ave. and Center St., Provo), Free
There’s a fine line between the highly original and clever music made by the Vibrant Sound and the — I’ll say this nicely — distasteful, Maroon 5-cover-band-esque sound of Truman. If you really have nothing to do at 2:00 p.m., go listen to Songs About Jane a couple more times. I promise that it will sound the same — only better and with less smugness. The problem with the Truman brothers (sons of Diamond Rio keyboardist, Dan Truman) is not that they make Provo’s worst music (they don’t — I saw a guy literally playing a saw last week), but that they seem so impressed with their own mediocrity. Having the right connections is a great blessing in the music industry and I have no doubt that Truman could some day end up being “big stars,” due to said connections. But great record sales and a famous last name do not good music make — just ask the Jonas Brothers.

“Disco Night” | Saturday, 9:00 p.m., Classic Fun Center (250 S. State, Orem), $6
Let’s just be honest: disco was never cool. Even when disco was “cool,” it wasn’t cool. I realize college students have a penchant for doing otherwise stupid, ghastly things in the name of “humor” and “ironicism,” but please — my dear friends — please abstain from trying to resurrect disco. It wasn’t cool in the 70s and it won’t be cool now. A benevolent God won’t allow it.

Happy 4th of July from everyone at Rhombus!